When God Disappoints You

I posted on my Instagram, saying that I'd read "Greater" 3 times.

In 2014, I felt so related with people whom Pastor Steven mentioned in the book.
I started by saying "I didn't want this" and then ended up joining the club.

Club of people with "wasted faith".

I was an idealist, I came up with my own "formula" of how God works or would work and if something doesn't happen, you need to fix the mistakes, they aren't on God for sure. 

It happened to me and guess what, I spent months living in the accusations I directed towards myself (and devil conveniently joined the party). 

Many Christians believe what I believed and they still do.

But as I grew up, I met an end of this belief system.

No matter how spiritual you are, there are things you will not understand.

This fact left me at a loss for words, that God does not reveal EVERYTHING to you.

I believe that's what makes God (not us) God and us to have more compassion rather than callousness by judging people.

If you are following God and you feel out of place, you are not alone.

Hope you receive something through message excerpted from "Greater" below:

...

Sometimes people hear from God, or think they hear from God, and they burn their plows. Or they dig their ditches. Or they pour the one jar of oil. And instead of being given beauty for ashes, they are given ashes for ashes. All they seem to get for burning their plows is the smell of smoke in their clothes. All they seem to get for digging ditches is muscle spasms for weeks to come. And pouring out their little bit of oil doesn't fill more vessels but only wastes what precious oil they had to begin with.

When God asks for something and you don't get anything back, it can feel like sacrifice. Or it can feel like you just got robbed.

I know a guy who felt certain God had called him to fulltime vocational ministry, so he quit his comfortable job in the music business. He wasn't chasing fame and fortune. His heart was as pure as it could have been. But his decision cost his family dearly and created tension between him and his wife. After years of languishing, long after burning every plow he ever had, he went back to his former business, embarrassed and unrewarded. He had to provide for his family.
One of my closest friends in ministry and his wife have been married many years without children. For years they longed for kids, but finally they came to feel at peace with the idea of never having any. Their lives have been rich and fulfilling, populated with many spiritual sons and daughters. They were content with the apparent fact that biological parenthood was not God's route for them—until people all around them began to share words of alleged prophecy from God about the child they would bear. Sincere women regularly accost my friend's wife, asking if she is okay with not having kids. Some who barely know her ask if she has physical issues that keep her from having children. As their family, or lack thereof, has become a regular topic for everyone from parishioners to visiting preachers, they say it's getting hard to be okay with it anymore. And still there is no child.

I could share hundreds of heartbreaking stories about unfulfilled desires in the lives of believers. When you're a pastor, you wade waist deep in them every day. But some stories hit closer to home than others. And whether you can relate to their specific struggle or not, I think you'll find something to relate to in the story of the Bishops.

....

 - See more at 99.5 KKLA



"Everyone experiences what seem to be unanswered prayers. But in God's economy, no one's faith is ever wasted.
God is working on our behalf even when our prayers don't seem to be working at all. Maybe one day we’ll see that the greatest setbacks in our lives were actually the greatest setups to seeing God’s glory in places we didn’t even know to look"
- Steven Furtick

22, Single, Greater

Hola everyone, it's been my usual tradition to post something after my birthday just to say, "yes it's been a week, and you might've missed it". I come from a family that doesn't celebrate birthdays much, so my birthday was pretty much the same as my normal days. (the last time  my sister and I tried to organise a surprise birthday party for mom, it almost put me into an argument with dad *true story)

I've posted on my path, but...
I thank y'all for your words of encouragement, your thoughts and even for your gifts that soon to be delivered *muahahaha (assuming they were sincere).
I don't know why I thanked you sarcastically, but maybe it's because now I'm in Palembang right now where people talk like this all the time.

Arriving in Palembang right before Christmas 2014 gave me a chance to join Gereja Mawar Sharon (Rose of Sharon Church) Lighthouse's Christmas Celebration: Precious Moment.
The lead Pastor, ko Maxi Eduard Lonta, who spoke as that day's preacher ministered a really anti-mainstream message of Jesus Christ.

Rather than speaking the typical 'heart-warming' message of Christmas, he spoke the message of repentance continued with the message of salvation through Jesus Christ.
I saw this preacher got so fired up and shared the gospel, so I was like "preach on, pastor" almost all the time. I can say one thing for sure, this guy preached what God put in his heart.
I said, "I want to see how God uses this church, which is pastored by someone brave enough to speak out the message of repentance boldly" and I pray for it, I really do.

I'm grateful to meet someone who isn't sugar-coating the Word of God at my community.
This opportunity is really helping me to keep holding onto what I believe, as well as to find my own greater calling.
Currently I withdrew myself from my social medias (I'm still using some though, ain't gonna be a shut-in), which resulted me to have more self-control, more time for other useful activities, and even enabled me to reach serenity in living my life, HA!
But seriously, because I check on my news feed less, I become more spiritually and mentally fit when meeting my friends or having a one-on-one session. I think, being absorbed too much into these medias will only cause us to lose our Spirit-driven self control.

Especially when I was struggling in deciding my future career. If I were given a chance to do anything (without any consideration, it is), I would like to answer: "a pastor" or "a preacher".
Coming near to the end of my study in Malaysia, I struggled even harder.
My dad is a businessman and I'm the first child in my family.
It means my parents kinda have an expectation on me to own a business.
After months of praying, finally in January, I let go of my own ego.
Ego, you said?
Yes, because as I said, me being a pastor (in my own version) is egoistic.

Only right after I said to God, "If there is something I learn by not running away from what my parents told me, so be it, God", I saw where God wants to lead me to.
What if there is strength that I need to embrace along my journey?
What if there is a specific advantage God wants me to have by following this plan?
What if God's plan A is something I always refused to even consider?

I was reminded greatly, especially by GMS's fasting movement with the tagline "humility comes before honor".
"Humble yourself, Indra", I told myself.
I'm finding out God's purpose for my life in more specific ways and I would like to write a post about it when it becomes clearer.

Then I started 2015 with a unique circumstance, where we 'celebrated' our New Year in SGH Hospital, as my twin sister collapsed due to partying too much *yea right
We love this girl so much, to the extent that one of us wore a Stitch costume for her.

Jadi ceritanya gua ga ke Batam sendirian.
Anyway, muka Bri sangat menghibur di sini.

Mission Accomplished ya kawan2 :D

Hate me as you want, I'm posting it anyway.
Wellney 15:13 Greater love has no one than this, that a brother put on a Stitch onesie for his sister 

Entering the age of 22, I felt like thanking Vedo Irawan for the first Leonis FC jersey he gave to me last year. Same number, eh?

Thank You, Jesus for my 22 years.
I know I've made the best possible choice to believe in You and trust You with my whole life.

One of the most often wishes I got recently was "cepet dapet jodoh ya" while I'm like "nah, not so soon, dude" hahaha.
Not that I don't support the gift of marriage, really, I'm all in for a godly marriage, but I don't agree with how most of us see the gift of singleness.

Truth be told, single is underrated.
There is this trend, or pattern, occur among us to treat singleness as a disability - an incomplete state of life - or even a problem.

"I'm just joking about it"
Okay, it's cool
But doesn't it still treat the gift of singleness wrongly?
It affects our perspective about singleness, much.

1 Corinthians 7:25-27 (ESV)

25 Now concerning the betrothed, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy. 

26 I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is.

27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife.

Does it sound like Apostle Paul was against the idea of marriage?

Nah, verse 28,

28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that.

So...

It's good with your dream of marrying someone, but don't you know that it's good that you are single too?

Many things have happened to me, but I remain the same on my standpoint about this matter.
I may not be a suitable person to talk about relationships, marriages and stuffs, but let me talk from my own experience in the efforts of setting myself apart for God: Singleness is not a disease. Singleness is gold.
(you may see my 22 years without having dated anyone as my advantage or my disadvantage, your call)

Greater life doesn't occur only when "two become one", there is greater purpose when "one stays as one" as well.

When we say "Christ is enough", then in ALL seasons in our life, He never ceases to be enough, whether you are single or married.

Isn't it the best choice you've ever made to stay single rather than to marry wrong person?
The Bible said it best:

Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife - Proverbs 25:24

But y'know what? Rather than marrying wrong person, it is worse to be a wrong person to get married to.
So don't be that kind of person, period.
Become someone whom you want to marry wants to marry.

I know this ain't gonna eliminate your question "when" or "who".

Having this kind of faith - that trusts what God speaks about singleness - won't make all your questions go away.

I believe that faith is not eliminating all the questions that might come up, it is trusting your questions to Someone with the highest authority.

The opposite of faith is not doubt, it’s certainty. - Anne Lamott

Nevertheless, as Pastor Steven declared: It's gonna be worth your while!

So even if there were times I asked "oh really, God?", I ain't rushing, no matter how many people that came and told me to do so (true story). Instead, I'm kind of able to figure out how my older friends feel during this situation.
To remain sanctified, complete in God's love and pure before God, should be our main concern.

I don't want to skip my current season, I'm embracing my season!

Ecclesiastes 3:1

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: